umm Abdillah, Radio Islam Programming – 2014.08.14 |18 Shawaal 1435
The recent suicide of popular actor Robin Williams, reportedly due to depression has once again shone the spotlight on an undiagnosed malady in our own community. Considering that depression can affect men differently than it does women, and considering that male depression often goes undiagnosed and can have devastating consequences (like suicide) when it goes untreated, a few coping mechanisms were discussed on this morning’s drive-time edition of Sabahul Muslim with Moulana Sulaimaan Ravat.
Men, more commonly than women are likely to feel angry, irritable, and frustrated rather than sad when depressed. Instead of withdrawing from the world, or sharing their problems with a friend, or lashing out, men may act recklessly or develop a compulsive interest in work or a new hobby. Instead of crying, men may engage in violent behaviour.
Common symptoms of Depression:
- Recurring insomnia or excessive sleeping
- Abnormal weight loss or gain
- Guilt or worthlessness feelings
- Poor concentration
- Daily Fatigue or low energy
- Diminished interest or pleasure in almost all activities
- Frequent thoughts of death or suicide.
Depression can also display itself through physical symptoms such as joint pain, chest pain, back pain, appetite changes and digestive issues. Physical symptoms of depression can be easier to ignore than emotional ones and are often attributed to other causes. As a result, many depressed people never get help and sometimes; even doctors miss the signs.
Reasons Depression stays undiagnosed:
- Failure to recognise depression.
- Downplaying its signs and symptoms.
- Reluctance to discuss its symptoms.
- Resisting mental health treatment.
The higher suicide rate among men is a worldwide phenomenon. Global stats indicate that men account for only about 20 percent of suicide attempts, but represent about 80 percent of completed suicides. This is because they choose more lethal methods: guns and leaps from high places instead of drug overdoses. The reasons why men are more likely to kill themselves are complex — but risk factors include unemployment, social isolation, chronic illness, and certain occupations that have access to the means of suicide.
Sometimes, traumatic events such as sudden death or illness triggers depression. Early social interaction and a man’s childhood also play a major role. If a man felt neglected or unloved by his parents, or ostracised by other children, depression is more likely to become a companion. Eventually, however, clinical depression boils down to a question of biochemistry. Men who suffer from clinical depression have an imbalance in their brain chemistry that causes suffering for no reason and without warning. While looking to the past to find the root of a man’s depression can be beneficial, a focus on positive and active treatment now and in the future is most essential.
Quraanic Healing
Allah tells us in the Holy Quran: “He is the One who makes you laugh and cry.” [53:43]
In essence, sadness is part and parcel of human life and part of being “human”. It is a normal human emotion which all human beings experience at different phases in their lives. The Ambiya all experienced immense sadness and grief, but it didn’t stop them from pursuing their missions even more vigorously. Their sadness didn’t result in hopelessness, nor leave them in a state of inaction. They went through periods of sadness, but not depression.
The difference between depression and sadness is that depression is characterised by hopelessness – a loss in the meaning of life, self-worthlessness and feeling sad without being able to identify the cause of the gloom and doom in life.
It takes an effort to practice healthy coping skills rather than denying or ignoring symptoms of depression, or trying to blunt feelings with alcohol, other drugs, binge behaviour and haram options. Treatment with a doctor or mental health practitioner can help one to learn healthy coping skills.
There’s a huge trend world over, that revolves around quickly and haphazardly prescribing potent drugs to sad or clinically depressed people. Due to that, over-prescription and drug abuse is higher than they should be. Antidepressant usage has doubled over the last decade. Medication for mental illness is extremely powerful and should only be used by those who absolutely cannot function without.
Remember the following:
– Define and authenticate our ultimate Goal of life. Islam teaches us that we should focus on our goal of succeeding in our Afterlife. If we emphasise the transitory nature of this worldly life, then most of our problems lose their importance, and subsequently lose their power of a having negative impact on us.
– With difficulty, comes ease.
– Everyone needs a support system, and everyone needs a best friend, and everyone need role models. Don’t isolate yourself.
– Allah never burdens a soul more than it can bear.
– Everything is in a flux. Nothing ever stays the same. This means people in health will soon face illness, people in illness will soon have relief. Those that are happy today will soon undergo some sadness, and those who are sad will have happiness. This means that your situation will not be the same forever. If you are not in control today, there will come when you will be.
– Develop gratitude for the blessings that Allah has given you.
– A depressed person needs a source to turn to, turn to Allah for help, support, mercy and forgiveness.
– Don’t skip salaah. Talk to Allah in dua.
– Live one day at a time.
– Surrender your unmanageable problems and things over which you’ve lost control over to Allah.
– Always Hope in Allah’s mercy.
– Get involved with religious organisations, charities, or some other volunteer work.
– Say “al-hamdu lillah” a few hundred times a day. This means, “All praise and gratitude belongs to Allah”.
Together with a healthy eating, exercise and sleeping plan, don’t revel in depression. Do not use it as an excuse, nor exalt it. Understand it is a destructive force. May Allah grant us all aafiyah. Ameen.
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