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* Ask 0800 operators for their home phone number. If they don’t give it to you ask why they are calling YOU at home.
* Honk and wave to strangers.
* ONLY TYPE IN UPPERCASE.
* Repeat everything someone says, as a question.
* As much as possible, skip rather than walk.
* Reply to everything someone says with "That's what YOU think."
* Forget the punch line to a long joke, but assure the listener it was a "real hoot".
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The IRS decides to audit Grandpa and summons him to the IRS office. The IRS auditor was not surprised when Grandpa showed up with his attorney. The auditor said, "Well, sir, you have an extravagant lifestyle and no full-time employment, which you explain by saying...
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